Jokes

What happens when you rearrange two of the letters in the word “nuclear”?

It’s unclear.

@ghost-of-a-duke said
What happens when you rearrange two of the letters in the word “nuclear”?

It’s unclear.

@suzianne said
It's too early for this.

I should've stayed in bed until noon.

@ghost-of-a-duke said
My jokes are best appreciated in the afternoon, after a strong coffee.

I saw a microbiologist yesterday. He was much bigger than I expected.

People always ask why I bring two pairs of socks when I golf. It's in case I get a hole in one.

Wait, are you here to pee on my leg and tell me it's raining?

You already did that today.

A man knocked on my door today and asked for a donation for the new swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water

I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. So she gave me a hug.

I've written a book on reverse psychology. Please don't buy it

Random bloke: "Oi! FMF, is that a little man hanging round your neck?"

FMF: "Oh, him. That's just divegeester. I couldn't afford a real albatross."

FMF was insistent that he didn’t want a brain transplant, but I managed to change his mind.

I’ve decided to start a new business selling glass coffins, wether or not it’s a success remains to be seen.

@divegeester said
I’ve decided to start a new business selling glass coffins, wether or not it’s a success remains to be seen.

@ghost-of-a-duke said
1987 called and wants its joke book back.